<marquee>  <<Sparta - cut your ribbion>> </marquee>

<marquee>  <<mood - im happpy :) >>      </marquee>

  Today was a pretty cool day :)  yeah so i was actulyl running extreamly late this morning because i put the alarm clock noise into my dream and then makes me just keep turning it off cuz in my dream its not there u no.. so yeah... but i got ready in time and i actully had to wait cuz kelly was running late today.. it was chill tho.. English is pretty hardcore like all the shit she gives us to do i feel bad for the wrestlers because there not getting home untill like 11 ish.. States Match i hope they did good :) then math talk about gay i wish mr morgan was teaching us... having a teacher who doesnt no what shes doing is like teaching your self... dosnt work as well... then aa was all right i was writting a letter to paul because he wanted one then our whole grade had to get a call picture talk about mess it was crazy! then lunch was.. weird.. talked to paul and linds in the hallway then went to spanish was actully on time.. wow! we didnt really do anything today cuz our class was ahead of the other classes so that was good cuz i didnt want to do anything... then i went to my locker and paul was there then we walked to the red hallway together and sometime on the walk he put a lock on my book bag and its still there... drivers ed was fun like always i got 100 on my quiz i was happy cuz i got a 60 on the one before it.. well after school i didnt have to go to the basketball game i was so realived! so i chilled with paul then i went to his house it was an interesting walk home.. it took us an hour jsut to get to the other sid eof the street cuz we were walking his bike and there were glove issues and coldness it was crazy! well yeah so finally we got to his house we were going to go to lindseys after but lets just say pauls not allowed on the internet anymore or to hang out after school like games and shit.. so we just chilled and thought of ways he could get his life back it was boring but fun talked to linsey on the phone for a while then his mom called :-/ then after that we listened to music and i tried to make paul happy... then 5:30 came and my mom picked me up cuz i had to leave... then i got home and started my homeowrk.. i have so much tonight ive done like a little at a time and keep switching now im ... halfway done... and its snowing.. i hope we have school just so i can seem my friends and we dont have to make the day up at the end of the year.. but it would be cool if we had a snowday and everyone could chill at my house.. my mom finally got a job she started today.. i hope all goes good...

10 08 02

RIP

sean

paul

plummer

School.... it sucks i cant get on my live journal.. and im just sitting here looking at peoples myspces thinking.. how long till i cant be there anymore... so i was like ill write in my mindsay no one in fucking new egypt has one so i can write while in school...

 i woke up with a late start... so far its only 8:00am and i thought it was tuesday the 5th... and i was just like ok.. the 5th then i was like WHOA TIME OUT! its the fucking 12th and that just made me that much happier... the more days that go by the sooner till i see gary... even no i dont no when the hell thats gonna happen i hope soon i just want to be with him all night just holding him we dont have to talk or anything i just want to be with him... pathetic i no.. i never even met the kid... im helplessly in love tho.. what can i say.. actully last night i couldnt sleeping so i was doing some thinking about me and gary and stuff... we started talk like on this date 2 months ago.. thats all 2 months... and we were into i love yous by the 2nd week...

  do you think its crazy to fall fish hook and sinker in love with someone in 2 weeks that lives in kansas when you live in new jersey?

add me to ur myspace : http://profiles.myspace.com/users/5501947

I am just a fool for you 
          

dude am i like the only person with no friends on here what a loser!

hmm we had psats yesterday so no digital pub to waste my life away on the computer....

pratice wasnt bad we did a 15 min jog at the end then the weight room i like the weight room when im with my team.. im looking forward getting ready for lacrosse season i hope i lose some weight too!

i coudlnt sleep last night! pat called and i talked to him for like.. an hour then i got off the phone and gary called :D but then hes like yo ill call u back i have to pretend to be asleep and then i fell asleep till like 12:00 then i woke up and i was like omg he didnt call back and then i couldnt sleep and was getting like weird dreams about missing the phone call so then i just called him and he was sleeping... he goes to basics soon!! i hope then gets to come to jersey. i listened to underoath like 3 times and was still awake... then i actully woke up on time today! but we were late anyway cuz i my mom was looking for soemthing... so now im just sitting in digital pub listening to my punk o rama cd

Music - dropkick murphys / the dirty glass

Mood -useless

Dirty Glass Lyrics

Murphy, Murphy, darling dear
I long for you now night and day
Your pain was my pleasure, your sorrow my joy
I feel now I've lost you to health and good cheer
Darcy, when I met you I was five years too young
A boy beyond his age, or so I'd tell someone
Anyone who'd listen and a few who couldn't care
Still I welcomed you with open arms, my love I did share

[Chorus]
Darcy, Darcy darling dear,
You left me dying, crying there
In whiskey, gin, and pints of beer
I fell for you my darling dear

You shut me off and you showed me the door
But you always came crawling back begging me for more
I showed you kindness, a stool, and a tab
Then you poured me my pain in a dirty glass
(Yeah, you left him bloody, battered, penniless, and poor)
You know, I often stopped and wondered how you made it through my door
With my brother's new non-duplicate registry ID
Well you bit off more than you could chew the first day you met me.

You weren't the first to court me mister you won't be the last
Oh, sure I wasn't honey, I know all about your past
Listen to the big shot with his pager on call
You spent most of those nights in my bathroom stall
(Yeah, you got him high, but you left him low)
Mind you own business, boy, how was I to know
That he ws just a fiend and a no-good cheat
Well it's all in the past bitch 'cause now I've got it beat.

Check these people out ...  click the link then scroll down and click video its good

 http://thebriggs.org/home.html

IT BETTER NOT RAIN!

Moorestown today!!! im so stocked were gonna kick some ass

Haunted Hayride with the team will be even better when we win!

WARM UPS! omg if they came in this would be sooo GREAT

and.. if gary just like.. cared or something.. that would be the GREATEST DAY!

but.. the first 2 only happen if it doenst rain but if any of the 4 happen that day will be better

I have a test in sports med i should be studying for but im obviously not.. pratice was a bitch yesterday not that it was hard it wasnt at all we were on the freshmen field and... i hate that field... its soo like.. not pretty its bumpy and i was having bad drives then getting mad about that and messing up worse and i was just like omg.. and mad.. yeah.. then i came home and was in a bad mood... mom was feeling sick so i helped out with dinner then i was hoping for a phone call all night because i didnt have a good phone call the night before... and they said they were going to call back and never did and i coudlnt slep cuz i was waiting for the phone call then i called and hes liek... uh im sleeping .. so im like ok thats cool..... then i called him last night cuz he never called back i didnt say ONE word it was "i cant talk ill call you later" and he hung up on me... yeah its friday now... now calls.... i figured he wasnt cuz that happened once before and he didnt call back.. but i just get like frustrated... like its cool your busy just tell me maybe let me say hi or something... or call back u dont even have to talk... or just dont say ill call you back... uh... maybe im making a big deal but i love him and sometimes i feel like he HATEs me like what if he does and hes just not telling me and is waiting until he gets to jersey and we hook up to be like yeah dude i dont really love you and laugh in my face... ok now im getting paranoid..... wow! so...sports med test...gonna study

Music<Transplants . a quick death

Mood<Scared and Confuesd

oh yah awesome... ok so... 1 and a 1/2 out of 4

we got our warm ups!! they look soo good

we got to moorestown and i had a good warm up but like 15 mins into the varsity game they called it for lightning that sucks we were doing awesome!! like... seriously then we went to their gym and acted like fools then went home.. and now im bored.. and mad...

no hayride cuz rain and no gary cuz he prolly hates me at this moment

Friday - warm ups!!!  we got to start the game almost kicked some ass but there ws lightening :(  which ment no haunted hayride becaue rain :( so i just like got into bed at 7 and wanted to pass out but just talked on the phone

Saturday - woke up at 9 :( went to the outlets and i put in like... 77 applications then i went to work at the speedway and froze my ass off we got out of there at like 9 30 cuz we just wanted to leave and i like wanted to pass out but i talked to gary a little bit then went to bed

Sunday - woke up at like 7 and was like fuck no then woke up at 10 and had a weird ass dream... about like it was sopoused to be field hockey but then it went to being  a switchfoot concert... and... yeah WEIRD! ok then i went to one of the places i applied to take a computer interview thing... then i went to seasonal world and put in an application then came home and wanted to pass out but i just like was BORED and figity then i went to the field hockey pasta party! that was fun we watched Rudy we all left at like 9 it was fun tho then i was in bed and pat called me it was 11 and i talked to him till like 2 cuz gary called i didnt think he ws going to call but he did and we ended up staying on the phone till 3:30

Monday - i over sleep being that i got NO sleep last night i might sleep in like all my classes today my eyes burn and wont stay open... were wearing our warm ups today we look soo good its our last home game :( cant wait to kick some butt...

need to sleep now!

Music - Rancid ( let's go )

Mood -TIRED AS FUCK!

Yesterday was our last home game :( its sad the seasons almost over  looking forward to states the games are always more exciting cuz theres some compition but then we win ;)

 I saved a goal yesterday i think i had a pretty good game and it doesnt even seem like i tried .... well when i came home and just wanted to pass out but nooo grandparents were over from watching the game so we had pizza and i took a shower then pat called.. i didnt want to tlak i just wanted to go to bed... but then we stopped talking cuz i had to do a project and kept falling asleep and gary called at like 11 but i was like passed out i dont really member much... but he called so thats cool :) i hate school im so tired!

mood tired

music briggs- 3rd world war (warped tour 2002/stage 2 #4

dude school blocks the stupidest sites... we have myspace.com where everyone spends there time when like me  bored out of there mind then thers livejournal... they have to block that because too many people were going on that i just wonder how long till myspace is gone.. i hope not tho.. well one day i was looking at punkvoter.com yeah i go on later in that day cuz i wanted to print something from it for a class and its blocked! awesome!  so then i was like oh maybe i did soemthing wrong so yesterday i did it like 99milion ways still doesnt work :( i dont get it! oh well .. i still have myspace.... i have to do an excel project and i dont no how to and i dont think anyone did... hmm..... i hope no one does

yesterday - dude it was frezzing out when my mom woke me up it was raining hardcore and i was awesome no school but when i actully woke up i realized what i was thinking so then school was just a BLAH day!! in sportsmed we presented yeah i did bad and forgot a lot of stuff.. then.. in physics i just wanted to sleep no one wanted to there work.. not much different from a regular day but worse then in palumbos we had to do some group thing we all just talked didnt really work on the project. then..  PRATICE- we were sopoused to have pratice from 4:55 to 6:15 in the gym but we had to be there normal time so we could talk about clothes were buying but the guy never came so at like 330 we went out to the field... IT WAS COLD OUT!! but it was a pretty good pratice of course i got him again i didnt think it was that bad just thought it hurt cuz it was cold i looked at it today and its like BLUE and red and theres like a cut right across it weird. but cool lol... then i came home and like... did nothing talked to gary for like an hour i was actully awake for once then i went to obed

my hands are freezing

tsunami bomb - lemonade

"... Maybe not exactly from day one
Guess I never wanted it to be overdone
And even though you are a sleeper
Well, to me that’s never been a crime
And after all you woke up in time

So now you’re back on your feet again
Now you’re back to compete with men
Now you’re back and it took some time
To get from misery to prime
Now you’re back onto change the world
Now you’re back and I say : go, girl!
Now you’re back and you do just fine
`coz after rainy days the sun will shine

I know I’ve been part of reasons
Why you sometimes felt so sore
And I’m sorry I didn’t give you more
But now you’re heading better seasons
And your mom she’s watching you
From above with fingers crossed for everything you do

It doesn’t matter what others say
Even those you call friends
Don’t leave it out for another day
This might be your big chance

You’re the one always beside me
When I’m lost you’re always to guide me
It’s about time I give you something back
I’m the one selfish and greedy
Never care enough what you needed
But even still you had the strength to get back in the end"

school sucks...

pratice was FREEZING!

came home... talked to gary

went to bed

wow i have an exciting life.

 lindsey stopped by to see if i wanted to go to the mall but i just back from pratice and shit so i wanted to shower and shit but we might go today it would be awesome if i had money to spend while i was there... fuck im tired ugly and fat bye

Music: Millencolin - fingers crossed

Mood: Useless

Yesterday: did nothing in digital pub did liek cpr kinda stuff in sports med this one girl never has a partner so she always comes with me and kayla and .... yeah...  we both sit there and go ' i dont want to touch her ' ' dude its ur turn i did it last time' its so funny but wrong... and everyday she keeps coming :( oh well were the only nice ones in the class i guess... then AA is so gay i barly go i hate going when were in cochs AA this one kid is a total dick but it makes no sense because he still talks to me.. then Gee Ng's class.... god dammit i hate him and that class soo fucking much. i have a 74 yeah not the greatest but  compared to like everyone else i think thats pretty good theres a 38,47,54,64 and he like "picks" on me all the time 'tara are you sure you get this' while everyone else is failing. on time he told me my grade was so bad im almost at the point of no return... yeah all right because that is a C (i think) then one day i had to make up a test and hes like what can i do to make this class better for you and i said slow down yesterday he was gooing so fast and i was just lost so 12:37 came he was still teaching it and i just walked out while everyone else was still learning when i cant take something i because like a huge bitch i cant sit there and deal with it i didnt get introuble or anything class was over and i felt sorta bad no wait i didnt i hate him... then came palumbos class dude i used to hate him so much when i was a freshmen and i never wanted him this year but now were cool its funny cuz hes like dude you were like scared of me freshmen year you were just weird it was funny.. yeah we didnt do anything in that class we just got in groups and talked were slackers its fun. then school was over i sat in another coachs room for like 30 mins.. and we had to sign a card and maggie comes up to me and shows me what the one girl signed it was soo funny this girl is like wacked and talks to her self and is just fucking annoying as hell well... everyone signs it.... Name # she signs it 'NAME SMILE :)' who writes smile so of course i got REALLY annoying at pratice because i cant control my meanness and was just like SMILE every 2 mins linds was gonna beat me with her stick it was so funny so of course i had to do it more. i didnt have that great of a pratice i like "busted" my butt got muddy but i wasnt playing as good as i can and i felt like i was gonna die i think im getting stick and that would really suck but its ok if its for the weekend and thers not pratice.... then i got home and ate dinner, took a shower, talked to lindsey for a few mins, gary called talked to him for a few mins he had to go somewhere, then i just like fucked around on the computer for a while then went to my room and pasted out to some music. then at like 12:40my phone rings and its gary hes like 'sorry its so late i just wanted to call and say i love you' and im like mostly alseep i thought it was sweet even no i had to wake up

 that was my exciting day

today i realized the excel projects not due until next friday i was all ready to take someone else and copy it then put it in my folder yeah we play east brunkswick today oh baby there going down!! then me and lindsey might go somewhere since weve been trying to and havnt but i feel like shit now soo it all depends on how i feel after the game

Music: Thrice - to awake and avenge the bead

Mood: shitty

Friday-  we went to east brunswick and my mom and dad came and everything but yup no refs and we couldnt play cuz if someone got hurt we could like sue so that was bs. we just wanted to play thats the 2nd time this year so then me lindsey and lisa were gonna go home with my parents but we coudlnt they coudl only sign for me so i just rode the bus it was fun we listened to old school music and my chap stick with choc. chip cookies tastes like pepermint pattys yeah so we got home a while later me lisa and sall went to hamilton haungtings i was like hyper it just sucked but we made it fun u no then went to friendlys that was fun... i guess then went home me nad lisa slept on the way home. lindsey was gonna sleep over but she didnt so me and lisa went up stairs and just like passed out. and i talked to gary like 3 times thur out the night

Saturday - pratice it wasnt bad just freezing!! then i came home showered and slept from 1 to like 4 something then i talked to gary for a while then ate dinner rented a requiem for a dream. that movies crazy it was awesome then i talked to gary like on and off the whole night well i went to bed at like 10 and i think he called like.. 12 and 5 and... like 6 cuz he kept losing service yeah crazy and i still tlak to him.. what wrong with me!

Sunday - i woke up at like 11 cuz my mom made me later on that day gary called so we talked a little i went on my computer for a while i got a good like hour of aim/yahoo in then it didnt last so he called me and we talked a little more then i took a shower and went out to dinner with my parents came home talked to gary then lost him then he called and was like 'get on aim now!' his cell phone bill was $400 just for his phone so hes like fuck my dads gonna kill me and all this shit and hes like im never touching my phone again so then i called him adn we talked for like 45 mins cuz his dad came home. i hope he didnt die. then i talked to pat a little cuz i couldnt sleep and i coudlnt talk to gary

music -  new greenday

wow actully did work in class today

yesterday we played collingswood they were a good team varsity lost 0-1 there now 10-1-1 and we tied so were 9-1-1 pretty good season. the real season ends november 2nd :( so sad what am i going to do with my life when field hockeys over... ill have to find some people to run with for lacrosse season i cant slack! cuz when winter comes and it gets cold its like slacker time and i wanna do really good in lacrosse this year i wouild liek to play it in college... actully i would like to play field hockey in college too but who knows prolly wont even play anything.. college shit is so confusing i dont even want to think about it. actully i am.. i want to get away from jersey but in jersey theres people here friends but if they move i wont see them anyway then who knows if ill love anyone i dont want to be too far espically if its gary its been like not even 3 months and i just want to be with him i cant stand waiting any more. its better then being lonly but i still just want to be with him. and now we can barly talk because he has no cell phone :( that sucks oh well

music- less then jake

Hit it one more time for our men in uniform with a price above there head... THIS IS A WAR sober up.  glassjaw!

its been a long time so i busted them out today forever my number one band! followed by saves the day  wow im a loser

talked to gary last night a little bit :)

watched requiem for a dream for the 4th night i cried because when u start watching it over and over you notice all those little important things and there feelings and shit yeah dude so i cried pratice wasnt bad for us varsitys was hardcore... EASTERN today ... number one :-/ its ok tho alls we can do is play our best.

i cant wake up to a really loud alarm but at 3 in the morning i can wake up to a vibrating cell phone thats on the floor

we played estern yesterday....

 ONLY TEAM IN NJ TO SCORE ON THEM... what!!! and so did the number one team in Pa.. but where freaking new egypt!!!! and the refs were SOOO unfair no wonder the best team! and the score was rocrded as 6-1 i think BUT! 3 of them didnt count the one was before the circle the one was to high and the other brit saved and the ref even said its a free hit then changed her mind to a goal that was bull but .. Whatever! so i came home and talked to my darling dear. the 2nd call was funny both times i got to talk to his friend which is good cuz i got some info outta him yeah then its started to thunder and lightening and he was out side so we ended the convo there but i love him and cant wait till he comes here.  i have a job interview at the gap today.. the gap...... im not really a gap person but ill be close to kaylas store and i NEED $$$$$ soo its alll good

music - dropkick LIVE

mood - speical

Yesterday-

   bad NEWS:

i was really like flusterd and like not ready for my interview

dont no how to do excel

i have to take my first aid test again because i didnt do good enough to get certified

i had like A. D. D. in palumbos and i just like didnt learn anything and i have a test yay!

andy read my palm (or something like that) and told me somes lieing to my face

didnt have a good pratice

had to rush around like a mad women after pratice to go to my interview (i like beings sweaty and gross!)

Last game next week is cancled because it gets dark :(

last jv pratice

i still dont see gary :(

   GOOD NEWS:

100 on my physics *thats a 1st*

they pick a few jv players to go up with varsity to states.... I WAS PICKED

i had an interview... GOT THE JOB

I LOVE HIM HE LOVES ME! thers a love of love!

I got a text message! (its been a while)

Yeah so theres a few more bads on my list there not that bad but the good just made everything great... wednesday night just put me in an awesome mood when travis told me somehting it made me realize gary really does love him and like... i dont i love him! then that just made thursday so much better then the field hockey thing omg i was so happy!

-theres people you just drift apart from and dont want to talk to anymore COUGH COUGH and they tell you things you dont really care about and what are you sopoused to do because you dont want to be mean but you cant stand them anymore .... yeah ive become a bitch and i dont care but i really dont want anything to do with you any more- 

"Let’s play this game called “when you catch fire”
I wouldn’t piss to put you out
Stop burning bridges and drive off of them
So I can forget about you"




♥ *You know you're in love when you see that someone and your heart flutters, you're stomach gets butterflies, and the rest of the world disappears.*♥* If you really love someone time, distance, nothing can stand in the way*♥

Friday - school was uhh.... i dont member... we actully did a lab in physics but we just didnt he didnt relate it to anything what an idiot... but yeah friday was a half day so we went to wrightstown got some micky d's then of course the dolla gen. then to  my house for like 5 mins then game time hut. we both won then we came home from the game and we stayed at the football game. then lindsey came back adn we went to wawa then i went home and slept. i dont member if i talked to gary any... i think i did forl ike 5 mins.

Saturday - i woke up then... uh i dont think i did anything then me and mom went shopping its been a while since i did any driving. i dont member where we went but there were TOO many people everwhere. then we came home and i watched rules of attration and talked to jackie a little then i went to my first day of work. i folded clothes for 2 hours. turns out... I SUCK then we got like a 5min break so i said hi to kayla and sat with this other new guy while he smoked. he seemed cool... then we went inside and signed a bunch of shit and watched videos then home time. i watched rules of attration again because i was on the phone and i didnt finish it before then i talked online for like a while then i went to bed and right when i went to bed gary called. but it was like 2am and i had to work at 12 so he let me go to bed.

Sunday - i woke up a few time in the morning didnt think i was gonna fall asleep but i did! then i went to work from 12 to 4 stopped by and saw kayla kelly and lisa. lisa stopped by while i was working too it made me really happy! then i like got "dolled up" and then lisa got home from work a little earlier so we picked her up then we for decked out i have some pictures on my camera im gonna have to get on the internet there pimp!! then we met up with austin and don and went back into his words for like 45 mins then we came home and at ALL the candy i have one left and we ate like all the candy my mom didnt give out too.......... we got then lisa like fell asleep then she just woke up and we took more pictures it was SO FUNNY looking at them makes me happy. yeah so then viggie picked up lisa and i "did" my homework and talked to gary and passed out.  

Yesterday kinda sucked... like i was just soo tired and fucking out of it... then pratice came and it wasnt the bad we were all scared but we made it and doing 19, 25's werent that bad ill do them again better hten other conditioning then we went to Ruby Tuesdays as a team it was fun i felt speical because we got to go. Danny called me like a few times yesterday it was weird because i havnt talked to him in a while... then i talked to gary but he was tired so went to bed then i called pat he didnt answer so danny called back but i was tired and couldnt stay up then like an hour later of sleep pat called so it was like 12 and i was on the phone with him till like 2 sooo unaware because i was like half asleep... i felt bad... ohhh well....  i seriously cant wait till gary is here because im just like so.. "alone" it seems like... its such a weird feeling and i got like depressed yesterday like in my haed it just like came up dude im ugly and fat and fucking retarted why would anyone like want any thing to do with me.. and if  i werent in school i prolly would have tried to kill myself and.. that... would have been bad.

music- yellowcard

mood- depressed

We'll be miles apart
I'll keep you deep inside
You're always in my heart

oh snap i fould my halloween pictures 

ACTULLY i dont know how to put pictures on here if anyone knows can you tell me ... 

Yesterday wasnt to great. The  game was changed to 3:15 so we went out there and i dont no what happened to us we played..... horriable... we lost 0-3 weve played shitty and won but they were verse shitty teams we played a good team yesterday and just couldnt do it. its kinda like ever since we played moorestown and did good in the only like 15 mins we played i think we go full of our selves and hvnt played as good only again eastern then it seems like we lost 2 games and were ok with that but there are people thinking about what were gonna get when we win states... yeah.. we need to make it there first! ok done complaining... coach was really upset yesterday so no pratice today she didnt want to see us. that was like the only thing i did all day i slept it like all my classes and after the game i did my sports med project....

thing i HAVE to do:

think of a topic for physics paper and do hardcore good on it.

write 2 AWESOME papers for palumbo to bring my grade back up.

.. those are the only 2 classes i need to work on...

but then i have to get running when field hockey is over so i wont be depressed any more. and i need to talk to gary more! and ger more friends to hang out with .

tonight is ending tomorrow is promised to be better then the last but how can that be .. when your not here with me...

......your the only one ill dream of, your the only one ill lever love, your the only one ill dream of tonight

  years gone by (aMy)

Wednesday after school there was a team meeting i think it went well. then me and lindsey went to the outlets then out to conqure signs with kelly.

Thursday pratice 10 to 1230 it was actully fun and yeah i think it was smart of coach. then  i went home and napped.. then me my mom lindsey and her mom went out... it was fun but i was tired!!

Friday yay more pratice 10 to 1230 uhhh i had a bad pratice then.. came home.. talked to gary.. HE GETTING SHIPPED OUT SOON meaning.... ME in 8 weeks!! then me nad lindsey went to walmart scary guy.... wow... fun.. then we went to teh chinese buffet that was.. an experience.. fucking dick chicken... hmm i wonder what she did with it... then we came to my house and i fucked up her myspace..   ( GO TO MINE !!!! (add me too i need friends ) -  http://profiles.myspace.com/users/5501947 ) ok then i went to bed...

Saturday.. YAY 8 to 1030 pratice then me and mom got bagels! then i came home and.. then i went to work from 4 to ... 10... then talked to gary and fell asleep talking to pat :-/ i feel bad!

Sunday - work from 12 to 8 :( i wanted to go to the pasta part but noo i had to work.. i stopped by lisason my break i was all by my self and we ate a kick ass bagel then i came home and type my paper

TODAY - - - StAtEs GAmE vs Florence. 2 PM i get out of 5th.. too bad not forth...

The ocean is a fuck of a long way to swim
But I'd do it in a whim
I'd dive into the deep blue sea
Just so you could be with me  (ATM)

OMG THEY BLOCKED MYSPACE! i have nothing to do in class again how am i giong to write to jackie now! oh no!!!

STATES round 2... KEYPORT 2pm!

 WARRIORS

inch by inch

 WARRIORS

play by play

 WARRIORS

heart desire

 WARRIORS

start the fire

 Together we are

 WARRIORS

now that we dont have myspace in school i have nothing to do first period :-/ hmmm ill have to find something new ... im actully suprised it took them that long to block it.. but dude we need it back!!!

WE WON YESTRDAY!!!

 keyport "warriors come out and play.."

 Warriors 4-1

so were the central jersey groupd one champs... 2 years in a row .. oh baby

uh... i talked to jakie last night :) like  900 myspace messages later i was REALLY tired so i went to bed

 i really wanna hang out with her and some hot kid down by her..

"just because your beautiful that doesnt mean you can treat people like they dont matter...."

hmmm i hat ehte computers at school the internets pretty fast but they block stupid shit and u cant left click on stuff and iu cant ctrl alt delete stuff out if its fuckingup soo now i hiave to log off  :( oh while....

hmmm im depressed.. yay..

its a penfold kinda day.....

"But I would rather shape my soul than furnish it
And I'm tired of waking up and worrying if someone else is talking about me
and all the things that I've done wrong
I know that I'm worth more than how they see me
And so do we compromise our happiness for security or hope
that this fear is not nearly as strong as our hearts" penfold - amatur standing

friday-- it rained so we had indoor pratice it was fun we worked on communication like and "team bonding" we were all blindfolded and given an animal and had to make that noise then find our group  it was funny then we did the human not.when we did the whole team it didnt work out good we all fell it was funny! then we got a partner and one of us was blind folded and we had to bring them some where me and horner were together.. then... we played some game there was a vollyball net and there were two balls and we  had to call ball to catch ball and if we didnt do either the other team got the point.. i couldnt catch the ball :( then .. pratice was over me and sall went to wawa then i went home and did NOTHING while my friends got to hang out and get drunk im sitting in my room crying myself to sleep..

<This space starts out empty and I know it can't hurt more than it already does
And it all falls down around me and hits me in the face and falls onto the ground
And I wish that I could understand why I'm so upset to see these things I'll never have
My hands shake with anger and my eyes fill up with tears that taste like salt
And it's hard to get up; too hard to pick myself up off the ground
Laughing at me, if I could
Wondering by myself, if I could
I was lost at sea and you let me drown
To walk for miles, let the rain soak me until I smile
It's getting late, but I don't mind
I'm holding onto hands as drenched as mine and for the first time in my life
I want to cry and laugh at the same time
And I'm happy because this space has been filled by her
How could you say no, you should have come over and kissed me> Penfold - June

Saturday -- yay i had to wake up at 7 to go to pratice it was indoor which we were all SOO happy it was fucking freezing out.. pratice is a little weird indor but it turned out ok then.. once pratice was over i went home and took a shower then went right to work i was so tired.... i dont even member if i liked work on saturday... this one kid is covering my hours on monday i was soo happy!! i worked 12 to 5 soo i was like awesome ill go home and go out.. nope.. none of that taras a loser duh.. so i yet again cryed alone in my room at night.... i went to bed at 10.. thats crazy

[I've been thinking all day, sitting by this window,
remembering how the smile on your face could make me blush
And I can't comprehend how someone with your eyes
could ever dissapear and break your heart.
Fall, keep your eyes on something small.
Hold your head up high.
Angel, spread your wings and fly.
Fall, even if you can't let go.
If everything was perfect in my eyes - in my mind.
Too young to understand but old enough to know so many people love you
and hold you in their hearts and won't stop.
Remember tonight, it just might last you the rest of your life.
And all those time I said I love you, those weren't lies.
This will hurt you but in time, you will understand that I
would never want to be in his shoes but I would do anything to take his place.] penfold "M"

Sunday -- i woke up at like one in the monring and i didnt have a shirt on :-/ it was weird... then i made a phone call then.. because i couldnt sleep so from 1 to like 215 i was awake but i finally fell asleep then.. i woke up early :( i just want to sleep till like 3 so i dont have to deal with the day.. but it didnt work i guess cuz i went to bed early and i wanted to sleep .. so.. i went out to breakfast with my mom and dad then we went to wallmart and got hait dye... then went home.. i wanted to nap.... but... i couldnt fall asleep so i went online.. talked to jackie a little.. and.. i think thats it.... i like had random spirts of crying throughout the day.. then i went to work... and.. i was actully in a good mood at work... me and john had fun.. the hot kid said a word to me :O ... and... wade calls me newb its funny .. then i came home.. and dyed my hair then i talked to pat.. then..... i actully talked to gary... for more then 2 mins. yeah so i went to bed at 2  cried my self to sleep yet again....... im tired.. and.. yeah

"...It's too late to tell you that I care and I'm wishing you were here
And I think it would be better if you had never left at all
This place is not the same without the smile on your face
And if you were here then I would take you everywhere"

 penfold - ill take you everywhere

****WARRIORS****

Today is our state semi final at Lenepe vs gloster city. the school has a fan bus running that will bring some kids from school to watch us play some great field hockey. so many parents and family members are going to be there.. its amazing the support new egypt teams have! at the last football game that was away we had more fans then the home team... that awesome when people come out to watch you... well when we beat gloster city today we will go on to state finals at TCNJ (the college of new jeresey) and play on turff where all the new egypt fans will come out and support... that will be ever more fans! last year we filled up our whole section while pingry had like 30-50 it was just soo cool to see that much support. and the signs and the bells its crazy... and this year it will be an ever better experience... i wont just be being ball girl ill have on my uniform and we warming up with the team then next year when we go to states ill be playing in that game. its awesome to be part of a team that gets to be so great...

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Yesterday ... everyone liked my hair so that was kinda cool... but... the day for hte most part sucked i was in a bad mood.. and i dont no ... but after school i talked to ms menean and mr mar.. (i cant spell that) then went out to pratice we (the up comers from jv) didnt really do that much at pratice today butthen we did some coners at the end of pratice and i did some good stuff at least i kinda thought then after pratice coach came up to me and said nice defense and i felt speical.. whenever she says soemthing good to me it makes me feel like im getting better... and that ill actully get to play next year.  on our team at the varsity level there are some girls who  rarly get to play and i dont want that to happen to me.. but i made futures so that will give me more pratice and i will get better and hopfully be a starter :) ok ell after pratice we went to shannons house for a pasta party we finished watching shrek 2 it was good i want to watch again like all in the same time then after we finished the movie we "read" a story (each person got a part of the story to read) it was like the night before xmas but it had to so with field hockey it was cute. the party was over fast because there wasnt much movie left and the story didnt take that long.. well after that i went home talked to jackie a little she might come up this weekend! then i went with my dad to see the new truck he ordered its nice... and big adn the new mustangs are pimp in like frost blue i wanna get me one! then i came home and went to bed at 9 ... NINE! then i woke up i gues it was the vibrating of my phone... oh i just happened to get a message when i woke up .. it was from gary .... he appoligized for not calling made me feel better since we havnt really been talking and he couldnt call so he told me he was sorry it made me feel no so forgotten. then it took me a little to fall back asleep and then i woke up and now im at school im getting out soon!! i cant wait to go play!! or watch our team play!!

hmm.. i hope that works

We WON again yesterday!! 6-3 vs glouster city..

WERE GOING TO THE SHIP! SUNDAY NOVEMBER 21ST WE PLAY pingry .. (again) but this time there going down!!

I found some pictures online of us playing keyport http://www.app.com/appscholasticpg/1111keyhock/ 

 *i have NOTHING to do in first period*

-------------------------------------------------------

i talked to gary last night its werid i guess hes like a permint drunk latly.. and im depressed... its weird... oh wellle.. im so confused.... i love him but miss him and its just a bunch of weird feelings....

Seemed to stop my breath
My head on your chest
Waiting to cave in
From the bottom of my...
Hear your voice again
Could we dim the sun
And wonder where we've been
Maybe you and me
So kiss me like you did
My heart stopped beating
Such a softer sin

(I'm melting, I'm melting)
In your eyes
I lost my place
Could stay a while

And I'm melting
In your eyes
Like my first time
That I caught fire
Just stay with me
Lay with me
Now

Never caught my breath
Every second I'm without you I'm a mess
Ever know each other
Trust these words are stones
why cuts aren't healing
Learning how to love

I'm melting (I'm melting)
In your eyes
I lost my place
Could stay a while
And I'm melting
In your eyes
Like my first time
That I caught fire
Just stay with me
Lay with me
(Stay with me lay with me now)

You could stay and watch me fall
And of course I'll ask for help
Just stay with me now
Take my hand
We could take our heads off
stay in bed just make love that's all
Just stay with me now
 

The Used -  I caught Fire (in your eyes)

Yesterday got a little better...

sports med was boring coach wasnt in there today she had meetings and stuff so we had this weird sub lady and we watched a video on taping... omg it was the most boring thing ever after like 3 ankel tapes half the class was sleeping then she cmae back and we did some stuff and it was better... 

lunch/aa was... the usual me and kayla looked for her sisiter and got her lunch then at aa i went to coach megs room and learned how to do pully problems

physics we had a quiz and i got a 19 outta 20 on it so thats good because i made a little mess up ..oh well its still good i still know how to do the problems but he taught us something after the quiz that prolly know one understands because he is the worst teach and cant make notes so i have to bother everyone to teach it to me.. but we have a quiz on that today i dont even know what it is.. and i dont want to bother coach again because i do every time i have a quiz but if i dont ill stat failing shit again....

English we got grendel.. that books weird.. oh shit i left that at home :( and i have to write an epilogue i didnt even read war of the worlds and i cant be creative with aliens... sooo this is gonna be another palumbo paper that sucks.. i cant do good on anything in his class....

after school i just talked to coach menean *its all about my lax coachs* we just like made fun of people and i dont even no what we talked about but then it was time to go to pratice .. we didnt even like pratice we talked for like and hour and did like less then an hour in the gym we worked on like turff hits and stuff were going to a turff dome today adn tomorrow after school ... I CANT WAIT TILL FINALS!!  and after the turff pratices were gonna go out for dinner but we ahve to go all the way up to north jersey and we dont get first dibs on the dome because the home team won there game adn are going to finals first sooo we have to go later with sucks because we would have gotten outta school and out to a real place to dinner not like fast food... oh well its still cool tho

... field hockeys almost over.. im not gonna know what to do.. im gonna have to run and lift for lax.. but i have to find someone that will also give me a ride home... all my friends that drive have no reason to stay after and run... so... who knows waht im gonna do.. and.... before i know it futures will be here.. it would be awesome if i was good enough and got to go to the jr. olympics like ecke but it still cool that i made the team..  but theres like tournement teams for field hockey i wanna try out for the team but its prolly soo much money because you have to pay for like everything .. the traveling... the whole deal but it will be good if i make it... for next yer hockey and.. my futures in hockey .. if i have one.. i dont really know what i want to do iwth my future.. i want to play in college but i dont no if i want to be deciated to a team when im in college ill want to party a lot... and in college sports are even more serious and .. im not hte smartest when it comes to my habbits.... ohhh well im gonna stop thinking of the future it freaks me out

IM SO TIRED!!!!

yesterday was... long i guess i just want this week to be over and yesterday took forever.... physics we had another quiz that i didnt know what i was doing i got help form coach but i still didnt get it...  then these people want to fight kayla so her aa teacher made her go to guidance because they have the same class 5th block i went with her because i didnt want to be there and we had a substituteso then school was over... i had nothing to do so i went to mares room and me and amanda made an "eye" picture we just cut out all the eyes in the magizines.. it  looks pimp ... then 2:45 came sooo had to get changed to go play field hockey in a dome in flemminton which was an hour and about a half away it was soo long... and lisa didnt get to come up to varsity soo its weird because like i dont have a best friend with me.. like.. i have frineds... but lisa and i do everything and we always made bus rides barable.. i forgot my cd player soo i did home work for like an hour and 15 mins then i was like what the hell i dont do homeowrk... soo i stopped and i talked to a few people and we were finally there!!! the dome is presuredised... so when you walk in your ears pop and thers like weird lights i dont no it was cool but its like you walked on to a huge stadium it was cool the turff was like carpet it was cool i scraped my knuckles up im surprised there wasnt blood.... but thats good.. and this dome had like baseball fields 2 of them and what we played on could have been too but the cover the dirt patches up with like turff things... and its REALLY easy to twist your ankel so of course i rolled it! but pratice was kinda cool so at 700 we FINALLY got out of there! and went to wendys it was funny cuz when our bus pulled in we saw everyones face like drop then people that came in behind us didnt want to deal with the line so they left and we werent going to eat there but we all did anyway i had to make like 60 phone calls to get someone to cover my hours for me on friday.. but NO noone wants to work or there already working sooo if i get fired i get fired whatever.... sooo at... like.. 9 we finally got home  then we had bday cake for my mommy then i went to bed but gary called me! his sister had her baby, his cell phone was shut off because the bill reached $1,000 and yeah... he was on his friends phone and his friend got a phone call so we had to stop talking and then like an hour later pat called me... i was just passed out i dont member talking... then at like 1 gary called again because he said he would call back.. but he says that a lot and doesnt.. but he did and it made me feel a little better. yeah this morning i didnt want to wake up i feel like shit.. and im soo tired.... and im dressed like a dirtbag.. oh welll

FINALS SUNDAY!!!

I was only 17
when i got my heart ripped clean
how can i forgive you that

love's so confusing
the scenes are amusing
i have to express how i feel

one thing i know is true
i'll never replace you
a memory i rewind and play

Maxeen - soleil

TOMORROWS THE BIG DAY!!!

Pingry its our turn now! your gonig down!!!

NEW EGYPT WARRIORS its gonna be a 2-0 game US!!!

State Championship.....

Sunday i woke up at 8 took my shower get dressed my mom did my hair we walked out side and there was a sign by our mail box it said Warriors NE 17 and there were ballons its was cool so my mom made me take a picture with it. then we picked up jill and went to our team breakfast they were good bagels then coach gave us a little speech and ingouraging words then we got on the bud and listened to music the whole way there then we listened to our game time prep speech and before we knew it we were at the college of new jersey. we  all had to pee so we went inside the like main building and there was like a convention going on and everyone looked all nice then the warriors come thourgh and there like "warriros warriors!" and we all got good lucks and stuff it was awesome! then soon late we took a team picture then we were on the field warming up.  then it was gmae time.. they said all our names and the fans cheered it was awesome then the game started we dominated there were soo many corners we just couldnt get it in we lost 2-0 it was 1-0 at the half i really thought we were gonna get it we played a good game.. when they scored there second goal the tears started to roll down my face because i new thats when we werent going to win.  when the game was over pingry was so happy and we were in tears we went on the bus and went to coach k's house. when our bus pulled up there were so many people and cars sitting outside waiting for us when we walked off the bus everyone clapped and cheered it felt so good. because we really did play a great game and we had a great season. well about 2 hours later we left and got home to a GREAT call from the gap NOT they called to ask when i planned on coming into work so i called and told her i couldnt come in and shes like so why did you wait till 4 to tell us this.. i was really like emotional yesterday so i started to cry and i was like listen i called tuesday to make sure i had this day off and shes like hold on and i just wanted to cry like hardcore.. then she comes back and shes liek well i dont no what there gonna do about you and your no shows... i just wanted to be like fuck you i dont need this job... seriously thursday i ca lled my ass off looking for a god  dam person to cover for me on friday and no would would do it because there too lazy or were already working...  and its not like youve even paid me yet or  gave me a list of phone numbers its a good thing someone gave my there and new other peoples.. so fuck you i had a state championship to attend.. yeah so after that i started my homework from 5 to like 9 i was writing my paper i couldnt focus it was bad... then i talked to pat... i tried calling gary.... i really wish he would call since i cant get a hold of him

Back up, back up, let's fucking go!
Beat up, keyed up, that's rock'n'roll

awesome i forgot my backpack today....

yesterday i did nothing in 1st period same as im gonna do today... in sports med we took notes and talked about our project that i broought the stuff home to work on yesterday and left at home! then lunch was gay then aa was even gayer then physics we have a mid term coming up and we had to make a note card of stuff we want for the test and we had to do it for homeowrk and i left it at home..

MY mom just came  and brought my bag to school that releaves some stress for the day but it doesnt get me out of not doing my english homeowrk like i hoped soo looks like ill be readind sparknotes soon. and.... well in english our new project is to write like about 3 days like all ours thoughts and stuff.... ive had some pretty deep thoughts i dont no if i want palumbo to read about them.... well kayla wasnt here yesterday it sucked.... she better be here today.... well i went home on the bus .. did NOT like it at all but i did get dropped off in front of my house which is pretty cool last year the bus stop was a mile like seriously away from my house... so when i came home i sat around a little then i went for a jog it took me a while to get motivated to go but i finally went.. did 2 miles... it took me like 18:45 mins it was like a 9 min little over a mile but whatever i wasnt going for a quick time i was just going for a jog...

today i have to stay after iwth palumbo i hope kays here and stays too then im gonna go run and lift with coach menean... i hope i keep up the jogging and everything i wanna lose weight and i want to be a starter!

yeah so last night i was sopoused to call pat at 1130 i fell asleep early then i called and he didnt answer and i didnt feel like dealing with my cell phone so i fell asleep.. havent heard form gary since friday..... i no he doesnt have a cell phone anymore but he used to call from travis' so.... i dont no.. i wonder how long it will be before he calls.. i thikn i have a problem tho becauselike i dont talk to him and stuff but if im talking to someone else i cant stop thinking about him like pat asked me to do something but i was just like.. i remember telling gary he is the only one i would do this for and all kinda stuff and i dont want to do it for pat... if bat enough i did that with something else between me and gary...

"all i no is that i .... love you tonight...." i used to say that without hesitation ... .like i seriously do love you but do you love me... am i just paranoid... should i just move on... like things used to be sooo great... i actully had a smile on my face now the only thing on my face is the tears... i seriously have been crying a lot latly i dont no if its you or what.. but it feels like around one around me is happy and enjoying life.. then theres just sitting back watching everyones happiness... like a moive were im the narrator. i dont no i fell so nothing....

wow that shit depressed me... men... well digital pub was all right yesterday i finisihed my notes for grendel then in sports med we did a project in the imc then lunch was just me and kayla. i went to her aa then physics was gay... i never pay attention... then went to palumbos it was ok but i had like a.d.d. i cant do shit latly... after school i stayed with him for detention i worked on my sports med project.. then i went to coach menenas and we lifted and ran the cross country... i thought i was gonna do bad but i didnt.. i was good took about 21 mins... so well just have to keep getting better at that.  then at like 5 my mom came to pick me up then went home and did nothing after dinner i typed my paper after about an hour add flared up again and pat called i talked to him for a while.. then he had to go back to work.. at least he calls me gary used to call me all the time... even on like 2 min cig. breaks.. and liek at night just to say hi adn i love you.. nothing now :( and i cant call him because hes never home.. so whatever.. just hope he remembers me... ok yeah after i did my paper i went to my ocmputer and i got 2 hours of my ocomputer im so proud of it.. and then pat called at 12 then i went to bed.... 

  did a lotta thinking last night and some crying.... fucking i hate this emotional shit i just wanna be god dam happy but i feel like i cant be because all my friends are having fun with there other friends and i cant have fun with my self other wise i might be better since ive been soo alone latly...

Yesterday Lindsey came over after school then we watched moives for a few hours .. Erica got her license!! so she stopped by :) then like... 8 lisa and vickie came by and we played pool for a little me and lisa wanted to get out soo we had vick take us to cans house... so me can lisa and erica watched a walk to remember it was fun ... then erica brought me home and i talked to gary and pat...

  YES i said it.. I TALKED TO GARY.. he hasnt called because hes been home sick and has no cell phone.. so we talked for a while then his med started kicking in so i let him go to bed.. then i talked to pat...

for some reason i didnt havnt any clothes on when i woke up so... i put some on then i thought i heard my grand parents so i stayed in bed and wrote some stuff  then i finally came down stairs and it was safe it was only my grandpa hes good. but him and my dad went to the football game so me and my mom watched the macys day parade then i watche pimp my ride then.. i took a shower and i drove my dad adn grandpa to pick up my grandma then i drove home... i think im getting better my dad only yelled once.. and it wasnt even a yell... but then .. i got home... and.... like an hour later it was dinner time.. the oragane things with the marshmellows.. i cant think of its name.. well they were good! thats what i love about thanksgiving... but after diner i started to clean up but knocked the candel over and me and my dad got in a fight.... cuz hes a dick and i have attitude latly.. so i came up and i made my myspace colorful < http://profiles.myspace.com/users/5501947 > im gonna add some pictures soon because i got bored of doing my myspace and i was like .. dam bad pics.. so i took like 50 no not really but yeah some im gonna change that...

Does any one know how i can post pictures on here.. like is there something speical i have to do?

well things seem to be... looking up....

last night i talked to gary :) .. but i also talked to like 3 other people pat and chase... AND theres this kid on myspace.. that i thought was like.. awesome... and he goes to school with jackie so she said he talks about me and i talk about him.. and we like had a good concersation last night he said i was pretty and we shold hang out and all this shit it was awesome because it was all the shit i was thinking!

yesterday i had to work.. i got yelled out because i socialize too much .. what ever i fucking hate that place.. then lindsey picked me up from work we came home and ate dinner then went to the mall i bought a snowboarding mag. because its been a while and its almost time!! and then i got a belt and earing for free dollars then came home and talked to jackie, jason! and a bunch of people and pat and chase called while lindsey was over  so that was my day

 we got the new fall out boy cd its all acoustic

..can you taste the fear in her sweat?

It was weird last night Jason signed on and was like hey ive been waiting for you to come online.. i didnt really think he thought i was cool i just thought i got lucky the night before. but im hopfully going to visit jackie this weekend which means ill get to meet him. we talked for a while last night then he asked me to call him.. i didnt want to because i had to call pat and gary but i called him anyway we talked for like an hour i dont even no what we talked about but i really hope we get to meet i dont no why but i just hope so...

yeah.. i no what i want but have NO clue what i want.  im wearing a pink shirt today which is kinda weird i feel weird..

Yo if someone can teach me this html shit and teach me how to put pics up because i cant figure out.... that would be great.. thanks ;o

.....when will our nightmare ever end?

Late to school ... again.. not like i care but if i keep being late i might have like saturday detentions.. and i dont want to make up early or be here.... soo fuck that...

Lets see i didnt do anything in digital pub... in sports med  i have the project that has nothing on the internet. physics... long metal slinkies are the shit! dude were gonna have so much fun....! english... uh palumbo draws bad its was funny tho then after school i talked to coach meg aboutmy sports med project then almost atarted the college talk but my other coach came so i got dressed then me lisa alyssa shannon menean and brit horn jumped in. we did kick boxing it was fun.. my but muscles hurt tho its fun then went to the weight room did legs... yeah  hamstrings... HURT then i came home it was like .. 530 :o i talked to jason for like 10 mins jackie for a while i relly home we get to hang out cuz we keep talking it up u no.  lets see thats pretty much all i did yesterday.. went to bed at 1130 thats early for me but im sooo tired... 

 its raining today and ther not  kickboxing or the cardio/yoga deal... so.. prolly going to run around the school then lift :-/ im tired of lifting... only 3 a week tho... (i hope thats all were doing!)

COHEED AND CAMBRIA
"The Light & The Glass"

Slowly the pen touches paper in the guidance of the words that you write.
Memories roll in; of the things you once did
and who you had shared them with. Is somebody thinking of you?
Did I bother telling you this, with the words that cross teeth and jump lips?
A poor choice of words, in wanting to tell you anything.
But words don't come with ease. They're forever my hurt.
Would it really matter, if you were to count the days left with your hands?
Your focus secure and the loves you left; well
smiles staged in photographs here until...


But you couldn't last a lifetime. Caught between here and the days of it;
carving her name across your arm with every wish. It's hit or miss... her.
I told you so. I measured distance in lines departing the rest of my life.

But you, you, you... you had better things to do

Liar, liar, liar, liar.

[With every wish... its HIT or .. miss]

Last night i think everyone was bored like today when i looked at mindsays everyone had soooo many people look at there page last night... made its just me

last night was like hardocre boring and long tho!
i talked to gary last night first time in like 10 days.
my school pics hardcore suck!
im not going to schol tomorrow!
im seeing jackie!! and Jason!
Mr Ngs the biggest asshole in the WHOLE like... everything!!!
yeah i dont no ..

 IM EXCITED!!!!!!!!

YAY...

 So today i didnt go to school so i got to sleep till 845 then i went to the dentist and dude that shits awesome and its not even real drugs.  well it was funny i was like half stoned. then me and my dad went out ffor lunch then got my car washed and i came home and packed and Jackies moms working ni new egypt today so shes gonna pick me up and drive me to there house to vist my darling Jackie!  and were gonna go to the movies tonight and meet up with Jason, omg we had a 3:38:55 phone call last night.. which is 213 mins and 55 seconds *i was on my cell phone thats why i no these numbers soo well* yah were both nervous boaut meeting eachother. im scared that were gonna make jackie feel like a thrid wheel and i dont want her to think that cuz im going up to visit her hes just a BONUS! yeah soo Mrs. Japple will be here soon! :D i hope tonight goes GOOD!! :D wee im excited!

Would you forget me this time
Forget the taste of your lips over mine
It's your turn to give up on me
Anyone else and it would have been easy

(What the fuck do you think love means?
It's much more than words and feelings sucking me dry
Is my marrow that sweet?
Your dead lovers have left a trail of broken hearts and misspent hopes
Sucking them dry
Does their marrow taste of sweetness, sweetness?)

  ~atreyu-bleeding mascara~

Well

Friday- Dentist after that i came home and around 345 jackies mom picked me up then we went to her house talked on the comp for a while then went for a walk then got ready to go to the movies then found out jason wouldnt be able to go because of his mom so i added some clothing then we went to the movies we were like the only ones there then like 4 people showed up it was a good idea.. no it wasnt the moives was pretyy stupid...  then we came home took like 2385 pics then went online till like 230am then went upstairs and talked then slept! til like 12 then we went onthe comp more pretty much it got home at like 5 took a shower went to my aunts for her birthday i dotn no why i went.. i was soo bored.. there were a lot of drinks i kept trying to get some barcardi in my cup but i was scared someone was going to see so then i got my moms cuzin *shes cool i think i call her my aunt... * well any way i tried to get her to help me but my parents were at the pool tabel for a long time *where the drinks were* soo i coudlnt get past them soo i just gave up... boring night.. im tired and have lax tomorrow...

My heart bleeds no more; now, it’s been turned to stone. your stomach feels sick for someone else. I’ve broken both my legs falling for you. drag me on the ground. powerless I stand, tarnished blade, cutting through, pushed into my vein. blood still stains my hands. sharpening my sense of pain outside, my heart bleeds no more. killing everything off inside. make sense of everything you tried to hide, hide from me. my heart bleeds no more; now, it’s been turned to stone. my stomach feels sore from cutting up. I ruined all my sanctity for you. smash me on the ground. I wanted to convince myself there’s nothing else to do. I wanted to. provide you with proof of what you put me through. I wanted to. pretend that I was you. killing everything off inside. make sense of everything you tried to hide, hide from me. my heart bleeds no more; now, it’s been turned to stone. your stomach feels sick for someone else. I’ve broken both my legs falling for you. smash me on the ground.

_silverstein_

ok saturday i went to hang out with old people i dont what i was thinking was i that desprate to go out??? :-/  sunday we had lax it was cool ive been working and i was tired... of course i rolled my ankel YET AGAIN i LOVE IT!!! then we went gor pizza then i did my project for 9 hours because i was barly doing it. talked to pat last night then i called up gary he bought a phone card so he said he'll call me tonight but he was drinking so he'll prolly forget.

it sucked me and jason didnt get to hang out :( i hope we still talk and shit other wise that would suck and be stupid like we talked three time and got a long good like we had a combined of like 7 hours

'cause i am due for a miracle
i'm waiting for a sign
i'll stare straight into the sun
and i won't close my eyes
'til i understand or go blind

should i be this depressed? why does this keep happening to me.... like i hate it... but its just like taking me over........

 well i have to work wednesday till 11 ... 11 im seriously going to die im like dead tired at uh... waht.. ALLL FUCKING DAY!! and its just gonna piss me off i hate that fucking guy if hes there im prolly gonna quite.... then i have to work till 11 on friday... and i have to work 2 to 11 on saturday good thing i feel like i dont have friends because i wouldnt be able to hang out with them anywy... and oh yeah.. i have lax at 7am on sunday insane  ill have to get up at 6 just to make ti ther eon time.. i cant believe that place even opens that early... im soo glad im really tired this week and just wanna do nothing but sleep but it seems like i can do everythiing but.....

 ive been looking into college stuff with ms martin....  i dont  no if i want to play lax or field hockey in college like i want to  play both but i honestly have noooo fucking clue..... i guess i just have to see how things go recruting wise and places taht except me... yeah its early for me to be looking im only a jr. but i shuld actully get moiving faster if i want people to scout me for lacrosse because this is the season for them to do it.....

but i guess i should do good in school maybe i should start by doing my part in a project.,....... i dont like palumbos projects i guess becvause we kinda did the same sorta shit freshmen year because he was the teacher then and just kept it with different subjects.... oh well this semesters almost over... im looiking forward to getting ride of physicss.... and.... engllish..... but i wont miss that slacking off... ill miss sports med.. and ill actully miss digital pub because i dont really do anything like now i could be doing all this college stuff b ut no i have shit to do and theres a project coming up that im gonna ahve to do nad i have to get spark notes something this week.. god.. why does it seem liek i have so much shit to do.... i just want a week like .. with nothng.. no work i dont even want to leave me house because i have no reason too the only think would be to run and lift which im also slaking on this week.. my diet went to shit... this week went to shit... from like last friday its gne down hilll

but good news for today uhh.. im gonna start working with swicki , coach nichloson said some like "positive" things to me today.. AMAZING! oh dude i think shannon on NJ.com for player of the year which is seriously awesome!!! our little town! yeah well i get to go to a project that ive totally slacked on latly tooo 

theres actully been shit to do in class everyday this week

i worked last night :-/ talked to jason its weird since we didnt met adn its like now cuz we didnt and prolly arnt for a while tisl ike thath we cant talk... hmmm... silverstein rocks... uhhh.......

I sent an email to Lock Haven Lacrosse and Field Hockey the lax coah got back to me last night and she said stuff like she'll help me though and i could meet the team and stuff. she hasnt even seen me play but i think its helps that i put down how i do winter league summer league ive done camp and 7v7 tournys  so i hope to heard back from the field hockey coach soon i do even more i do futures, summer camp every year, winter and summer leagues and im frmo new egypt lol i dont no if that means naything i wasnt on varsity any way

 wow the morning news is on and its sooo gay theres a comerical on improving the year books and there great idea is to actully hand out the order forms... wow...

 yeah ive been like hardcore depressed this week like.. i think that i need new friends.. but the thing is in new egypt there are no people for me to be friends with all the friends people have theyve been friends with for years thats how it kinda is here but.. .i feel so left out with my friends... like theres the four of us.. usully how it is me lisa erica and usully a 4th.. well this year is kayla and the ohterday the showed me pics of liek when they were hanging out partying... and i wasnt there...  lisa erica and kayla.. what happened to tara.... and thats like how i always feel with them.... i don tno .. i just dont feel apart of it.. i just wish i had like a boyfriend then i would have someone that would wanna hang out with me i hope.. shit class is over bye

Why is marijuana not legal? Why is marijuana not legal?
It’s a natural plant that grows in the dirt.
Do you know what’s not natural?
80 year old dudes with hard-ons. That’s not natural.
But we got pills for that.
We’re dedicating all our medical resources to keeping the old guys erect,
but we’re putting people in jail for something that grows in the dirt?

You know we have more prescription drugs now.
Every commercial that comes on TV is a prescription drug ad.
I can’t watch TV for four minutes without thinking I have five serious diseases.
Like: “Do you ever wake up tired in the morning?”
Oh my god I have this, write this down. Whatever it is, I have it.
Half the time I don’t even know what the commercial is…
people running in fields or flying kites or swimming in the ocean.
I’m like that is the greatest disease ever. How do you get that?
That disease comes with a hot chick and a puppy.

The schools now… It is all about self-esteem in the schools now.
Build the kids’ self-esteem, make them feel good about themselves.
If everybody grows up with high self-esteem, who is going to dance in our strip clubs?
What’s going to happen to our porno industry?
These women don’t just grown on trees.
It takes lots of drunk dads missing dance recitals before you decide to blow a goat on the internet for fifty bucks.
And if that disappears, where does that leave me on a Friday night with my new high speed connection?

Masterminds are another word that comes up all the time.
You keep hearing about these terrorists masterminds that get killed in the middle east.
Terrorists masterminds.
Mastermind is sort of a lofty way to describe what these guys do, don’t you think?
They’re not masterminds.
“OK, you take bomb, right? And you put in your backpack. And you get on bus and you blow yourself up. Alright?”
“Why do I have to blow myself up? Why can’t I just…”
“Who’s the f***ing mastermind here? Me or you?”

Americans, let’s face it: We’ve been a spoiled country for a long time.
Do you know what the number one health risk in America is?
Obesity. They say we’re in the middle of an obesity epidemic.
An epidemic like it is polio. Like we’ll be telling our grand kids about it one day.
The Great Obesity Epidemic of 2004.
“How’d you get through it grandpa?”
“Oh, it was horrible Johnny, there was cheesecake and pork chops everywhere.”

Nobody knows why were getting fatter? Look at our lifestyle.
I’ll sit at a drive thru.
I’ll sit there behind fifteen other cars instead of getting up to make the eight foot walk to the totally empty counter.
Everything is mega meal, super sized. Want biggie fries, super sized, want to go large.
You want to have thirty burgers for a nickel you fat mother f***er. There’s room in the back. Take it!
Want a 55 gallon drum of Coke with that? It’s only three more cents.

Sometimes you have to suffer a little bit in your youth to motivate yourself to succeed in later life.
Do you think if Bill Gates got laid in high school, do you think there’d be a Microsoft?
Of course not.
You got to spend a long time in your own locker with your underwear shoved up your ass before you start to think,
“You’ll see. I’m going to take of the world of computers! I’ll show them.”

We’re in one of the richest countries in the world,
but the minimum wage is lower than it was thirty five years ago.
There are homeless people everywhere.
This homeless guy asked me for money the other day.
I was about to give it to him and then I thought he was going to use it on drugs or alcohol.
And then I thought, that’s what I’m going to use it on.
Why am I judging this poor bastard.
People love to judge homeless guys. Like if you give them money they’re just going to waste it.
Well, he lives in a box, what do you want him to do? Save it up and buy a wall unit?
Take a little run to the store for a throw rug and a CD rack? He’s homeless.
I walked behind this guy the other day.
A homeless guy asked him for money.
He looks right at the homeless guy and says why don’t you go get a job you bum.
People always say that to homeless guys like it is so easy.
This homeless guy was wearing his underwear outside his pants.
Outside his pants. I’m guessing his resume isn’t all up to date.
I’m predicting some problems during the interview process.
I’m pretty sure even McDonalds has a “underwear goes inside the pants” policy.
Not that they enforce it really strictly, but technically I’m sure it is on the books.

-Lazyboy- underwear goes inside the pants

ha ha that songs great

im sure no one read it but i enjoy it, it brings me humor on on life sytles

Yah soo i dont have to work tonight because its raining and now one want to go to the outlets in the rain so.. FUCK THE GAP!  hopfully going to OUR (me kay lisas) "chruch" to worship the god of fire and "flowers" dam its been a long time its what im due for.. and hanging out iwth my friends is what i need i havnt really gone out with them theres always doing shit i want to do even no i dont want to its what makes me feel better so bring it on...

dude i was bored in first period and i made some cool pics on paintshop.. or i made cool pics... bad whatever.. but.. i saves htem to my shutterfly and the size isnt right and that sucks because i dont have paint shop at my house cuz $75 is crazy...

[ x]been drunk.
[ x]smoked pot
[ x]kissed a member of the opposite sex.
[ ]rode in a taxi.
[x]been dumped.
[x ]shoplifted.
[ ]been fired.
[x]had a job.
[]been in a fist fight.
[ x]snuck out
[ ]been arrested.
[ x]stole something from your job.
[ ]celebrated new years in times square.
[ ]went on a blind date.
[x ]smoked a cigarette.
[ Kinda ]gone on an airplane by yourself.
[ ]broken a bone.
[ ]had sex in a car.
[x]white lied to a friend.
[ ]went swimming in your bathtub
[ ]had a crush on a teacher.
[ ]celebrated mardi-gras in new orleans.
[ X ]been to europe.
[ almost ]made out in a movie theater.
[ ]taken caffine pills.
[x] been to disney world.
[x] had a crush on someone you hardly knew.
[] been to california.
[ kinda ]been skinny dipping.
[x]regretted something.
[x]peed on someones lawn.
[x]skipped school.
[ x]thrown up from drinking.
[ ]lost a parent
[x ]kissed a member of the same sex.
[x ]had sex with a boy.
[ ]had sex with a girl.
[]been in a car accident.
[i wish  ]partied for days and days straight.
[x]had a family member die.
[x]played 'clue'.
[x]had a sleepover party
[x]went ice skating.
[ ]dropped x.
[ hope not]been cheated on.
[x]had a boyfriend/girlfriend.
[ ] had a 3some.
[]had a sweet sixteen
[x ]had/have a car.
[x]drove.
[ ]had sex on a roof, with your friends unknowingly watching? -
[ x]but it sounds like fun

do you?
[]have a bf.
[ ]have a gf.
[not really] have a crush.
[x ]have a dog
[x]have your own room.
[sometimes]listen to rap.
[x]paint your nails.
[ x]play a sport.
[x ]play more than one sport.
[x]watch sports on tv.
[x]have a fav. group/singer/artist.
[i guess]have more than 1 best friend.
[not in physics]get good grades. (somewhat)
[ ]play an instrument.
[x ] have slippers.
[x]wear boxers. (to sleep in..)
[x ]wear black eyeliner.
[x]like the color blue.
[x ]like the color yellow.
[xx]like to read.
[x]like to write.
[ x]have long hair.
[]have short hair.
[x]have a cell phone.
[ ]have a laptop.
[ ]have a pager.


are you?
[ x]ugly.
[x]pretty.
[x ]ok.
[ x]bored.
[]happy.
[ by like 2 sentences]bilingual.
[x]white.
[ ]Black
[ ]Mexican.
[]short.
[ x]medium.
[ ]tall.
[ ]grounded.
[ ]sick.
[x]lazy.
[]talking to someone
[]IMing someone.
[ x]scared to die.
[x]sleepy.
[ ]annoyed.
[ ]on the phone.
[ ]in your room.
[ ]drinking something.
[]eating something.
[ ]in your pjs.
[x]ticklish.
[x]listening to music.
[just againt the mean ones, your gay dont be a dick i would destroy you!!!]homophobic.

Friday: after school me and lisa went tanning... talk about a waste of $8 like... yeah i would love to be tan but for me theres no point... so after then vick took us home and i wanted to sleep but i took a shower and started to get ready for work but like an hour before i had to go in they called telling me that i didnt ahve to come in! i was happy so i called up lisa and we went to the moveis with vickie, nadia, and melissa. we saw oceans 12 ther were soo many people there.. and it was weird because i stopped being friends with nadia.. but weve been talking a little latly.. and dude i just found out shes lit up once or twice so that made her cooler too but yeah then i went home it was uhh i dont even no what time but i was tired but me and lisa wanted to go out but vickie was too tired and nadia had to be home so that sucked....

Saturday: uhh my mom left to go shoping but she wanted to make sure i knew so when i woke up i wasnt like whoa wtf? soo when she did that i actully woke up at least it was like 1030 so it wasnt that bad but i diffently wanted to sleep later but i had to go to work at 2 so i took a shower and got ready then we went. Brian, John, and I all worked from 2-11 and me and bri had break together but john changed his to be with us... well he prolly shouldnt have because on our way back from wawa bri got into an accident.. and hes only 17 and had too many people in the car.. the accident wasnt bad just a dick pulled infront of his and the  roads were wet.. poor brian .. oh but one good thing the guy he hit, his regerstration was expired so .. thats 1 good thing... oh yeah and my wawa coffee went EVERYWHERE!!!!! when we went back to work i had to buy new clothes and i smelt liek it all night.  then my parents were at the mall when work closed so johns sister took me home and then i had to go to bed

Sunday: i had to wake up at 5:30 but i didnt until 5:50 but it was all good no not really thats really early... well anyway i had a lacrosse winter league game at 7 am! 7! thats  insane.. but i did score 4 goals!! oh yeah im a deafender so when i score its kinda rare.  well after lax i went home showered and me and my mom and ada went xmas tree shopping me and my mom wanted a tall skinny one nope.. but dad gets a fat one.. and what makes it look fatter is that its short.. and then we picked up my check because i needed the discount bar codes.. then me nad my dad went shoping for my mom and we stopped by Brave New World!!! and i just wanted to look at the new boards adn stuff but i wasl ike oh look this ones hot! dad look this one! then hes like... "well tara ill make you a deal ill buy u a new board you pay for the bindings" i was SOOOOOO exicted i like jumped my dad then i picked one out!! so I GOT A NEW SNOWBOARD!!!! and ride bindings!!! even no its going to be freezing.. I CANT WAIT FOR SNOW!! its white with black and pink writing... $320.. they didnt have the burton i wanted and that would have been like $500 something.. but i got a roxy its cooL!  there the link to it.... it looks better in person and with the bindings... http://www.bravesurf.com/acatalog/roxy_snowboards_pink_xlg.jpg ok then we went out to dinner with my grandparents then i wenthome and passed outbecaue i woke up at 6

Today: omg im soo tired still and i have to study the parts of the foot.. theres the phalanges, metatarsals, cuneforms, nuvcular, cuboid, talus, and calcuneses... wow i cant spell those but i member them all!!! good.. ok i have to write back to the coachs at hofstra but i dont no how to make it good because if i want to go there i want it to be good u no! so im going to talk to coach meg about that today... and then i ahve to go home like right after school and work on my palumbo project which i prolly wont then got to work :-/ then when i come home ill have to work on my palumbo project because im sure im not going to do it then im going to pass out and go to school and have to do sparknotes all 1st block.. i cant wait till xmas break.. i need new clothes and i need to sleep... this morning i started thinking of how to get my mom to let me sleep out on new years eve... cuz i no all my friends are going to get to party because there parents dont care about anything the do half the time they dont even no where there kids are.. but my parents are differnt.. so...

 i need a plan to get my parents to let me party....

hmm... Last night work wasnt that bad the gay guy wasnt working and i folded clothes with matt im trying to get us to get together to smoke its been  a long time .. but yeah shhh then i came home and worked on my project... not really so im going to do it in physics because i never do anything in there anyway i shuold be taking notes from sparknotes right now.. but i suck. i was going to go to the mall after kick boxing today with lindsey but i have field hockey :) if we get a shut out in winter league that would be pimp because we dont have a goalie and that means me and lynn rock as sweepers... i hope i get to start next year :-/ :D but... lax season is coming up i think ill start but thers garentees so i still gotta work my butt off plus it gives me somehting to do.. tomorrow night is the hockey banquet tho.. im looking forward to it its as mastories this year that means no shitty food and hopfully more room! oh no i want to go to kickboxing like hardcore today but i need a ride home at like 415 like seriously i wish i could drive i wouldnt have to be at school till liek 530 everynight its crazy... soo i have to find someone to bum a ride off of so i can go home to get a ride frmo someone else... dam i feel bad... i j ust had to make the banquet cover :-/ i dont liek doing stuff where im going to see it like often... cuz someone is always going to think its ugly .. whatever.... fuck them....

hm... yesterday kinda sucked... after school there was a ski club meeting, then em adn courtney did kcikboxing and she brought me home then i had to go to field hockey winter league dude we won 12-well it ws diffently 0 but i think he felt bad for the other team it doesnt matter... TRN was sopoused to play but there banquet was the same nighit and it was a bye night for us so we go tot play but it was counted as a loss because TRN forfeted.. but it was cool that we got to play.  then i came home and my grandma was there.. they wanted a table or something stupid.. then me and my dad wen tto cvs to get more pictures but the lady infront of us was there for a half hour... just making the pictures and we wanted 3 pictures!! she had 73!! 73!!! we were there for like an extra hour... cvs closes at 9 but everyone had to stay till 930 but this fucking lady and her 73 pictures...

 today is going to be  boring day.. i dont no what to do after school.. cuz i need a ride.. this really fucks stuff up... the fh banquet is tonight :) im looking forward to it!!

postal service... is kinda weird but there cool

fuck the background and pictures and shit i want to use isnt working :-/ ... this sucks... the banquet last night was fun ..... but the video wasnt as good as last years...

 thats pretty much all i did yeterday it was a long thing....

Its SOO cold outside!

 Good.. ITS COLD! that means snow and that means no school or work for me thursday because the places will be making snow right?!

 Bad.. its Frrreezing and i cant feel any of my body parts, and its sopoused to get warmer  on wednesday meaning that thursday might not be great :(. oh yeah another bad, when they built our house they didnt do a very good job i don thitnk my windows are in the wall good enough if u go anywhere near my window your die of frost bite. 

i scored 2 goals at lacrosse yesterday. Both my sets of grandparents came to watch so im glad i scored and more then once. then we all went our for pizza then i had to wrap my mom xmas presents .. i suck at wrapping like the side where u get all into folding the wrapping paper.. and of course we got my mom like weird shaped things from bath adn body works

i found a web site that i can download music on at school... i have about 10 songs right... but im looking for more... . its funny how when bands have there like group pictures there all pretty much the same no matter what the type of music...

Dude schools almost over i cant wait for xmas.. i need some clothes!! and to sleep.. i dont want to give my bed up to my grandparents on friday night... theres shit in my room and my grandma is nosy maybe i should just leave it out on purpose...

omg its only 8:10.... long classes are killer... i wonder what were doing in sports med... and how boring physics is going to be.. and i really hope my group doesnt have to do trials today.. hmm 815 i dont have anything else to even think about....

haha dude our girls basketball team sucks im so glad im not playing  there  losting by at least 50 point i think thats cuz all the good people quite then all the people who didnt play but still tried hard at pratice quit... soo they suck

oh dude class is over

Yesterday, i did some kickboxing. then some lifting... then went home and did some nothing ive been takling to mark latly.. i called up gary the other day and.. its was soo horriable i felt so bad. i miss how things used to be is depresses me remember how happy we used to be .. or maybe how happy i was... i noticed that i alwys talk to kids who drink and smoke alot and ther usully just like WERIDOS ha ha but there awesome and i relate... i guess thats why we talk but its just they have all these problems.. but u no what i have problems too yeah there cool kids no disrespect i was just noticing things... but its been so long since i smoked.. fucking halloween... and i dont even want to.. cept when i talk to these peopl im like dude i need  a trip im so fucking depressed i need that feeling... and drinking.. i havnt done that since october 2nd.. dude thats insane but ive been wanting to drink latly and not to drink to kill my self with it.... all my fucking frineds hang out and go to parties and shit.. why the fuck dont they call me.. i wasnt working at night all fucking weekend..and they do this shit to me all the time... being from a small town you dont really have that many friends and you have no other frineds to turn to because they all live far so i have these 3 "good friends" that dont do shit with me.. and the other people i talk to are just people i talk to they have there good friends! and they have boyfriends.. and i have... hm.. NOTHING... i have sports.. i gues you can say.. but im only "happy" when im on the field... because when i get off the field i have no friends to talk to there iehter... fuck. i need friends... i ned to get out of new egypt... i just totally fucking didnt  respect the flag.. but what ever people are gonna fucking complain about like i dont do god but i have to say it.. that shits gay deal with it.. its been that way for how many god dam years! all that shits gay... we all have some kind of god no mater what religion we are... u no its not like wrel ike JESUS you no... hmm what else can i complain about... i dont no class is over tho

ohio is for lovers - hawthorne hights...

dude myspace worked in school today.. ?! hmmm

its chritsmas fucking eve! awesome!! lol it totally doent seem like it..  :-/ but it is! dude soo many last min shoppers its awesome. work wasnt bad tonight. but dude last night i stayed up until like 5 30 talking to mark on the phone it was like 5 hours or some shit. it was awesome he is really sweet... just make me want to cuddle up with someone and lay with them talking at all my problems thats what we did minus the cuddling but... even no it wasnt there... it was there yeah my mom woke me up at 12 i didnt want to get up at all dude! and tonight my fucking grandparents are sleeping in my room because i have the "big" bed so i have to sleep in my old bed in the extra bed room. i hope someone calls me tonight and i hope gary gets with it and calls me..... even no i dont think its going to happen.... i guess were through.... its sad how it ended ... but the start was soo great.. like seriously it was beautiful the feel was awesome like the i love you was there like... i was singing i think i love you the like 4th night like seriously amazing. and last night i kind have got the faimuular feeling... but not the same... why does gary have to live up to his irish sterotype and not talk to me...

FUCK STOOP THINKING ABOUT HIM>!! ITS CHRISTMAS I WANT TO OPEN A PRESENT>> ME and my mom tried to make a ginger bread house itss ooo fucking funny looking... i want a boy frined... not all the friends i make and talk to on the phone that live at LEAST an hour and a half  or to like cali away. i want someone to be here now to enjoy the holidays with like give gifts to and have to hug and make me feel speical so basically i want someone to cuddle with...

What is love?  How do you no what feels like to name it as such? Ive experienced so many types of love... with out really being in love... When you first start talking to them and u have that great feeling your just like wow i really like this person we get a long great then you starting feeling... you start to like them stronger and.. the feeling becomes so strong that you feel that youve become in love.. but is it really love or is it you like them so much.  is love the feeling when your not hearing them they pop into your head at random moments. or just that there in your head the whole time no matter what? is love missing them as soon as you say goodbye? is that weird nervous gitter you get love? you know i could just go on and on with all the feelings... there kinda confused... so do you just define what you thing is love or is there an actual point where it is really LOVE.  and could what i think is love to me at this age be a total differnt thing... like... im only 16 so what i can say is "love" or that strong feeling of like going to be a feeling that comes often to me as an adult.. am what i feeling now going to be a total differnt feeling when i matur and things get serious.  like.. i dont know.. but all i know i love can be one of the most confusing things. makes you second guess things... and im not even in love. 

So. i dont really know the point to what i just wrote about .. but whatever. i kinda just let my mind run so it prolly doesnt make sense and im not going to read it ... but i want to know how like people feel about the whole subject of love and things.. it would also help with a reasearch paper ill have to write next month. thanks.

About Me [ Describe Your ]

x. [Wallet] green

x.[Hairbrush] purple  

x. [Toothbrush] its electic  

x. [Jewelry Worn Daily] class ring. earings

x. [Blanket] i have a few... it gets cold
x. [Facewash] apricot scrub

x. [Coffee Cup] wawa

x. [Sunglasses] not really  

x. [Underwear] thong thong thong

x. [Shoes] vans or those boot things *SO WARM*  

x. [Favorite Shirt] hmmmm .... i dont like shits i like the xip up jackets

x. [Favorite Pants] these pants i got from old navy that look like dickies  

x. [CD In Stereo Right Now] Postal Service, Senses Fail, and NYC underground dance part 5 disk 2

x. [Tattoos] none  

x. [Piercings] 9 ears, 1 belly

x. [What You Are Wearing Now] hmm its only 4 soo sweat pants and tank top  

x. [Hair] long..im gonna strighten it...  

x. [Height] 5'6"

x. [Shoe size] 10

x. [Parents] mommy and daddy

x. [Siblings] onlny child

x. [Live With] mom and dad

x. [When was the last time you...]  ??? if its waht i think it is.. last night or at like 530 while taking to mark lol *7 hours!*

x. [Smiled] ha ha now cuz marks singing :diong diong diong: 

x. [Laughed] now
x. [Cried] last night

x. [Bought] ticket to see meet the fockers but if like object i dont no i stole earings from clairs...

 x.[Danced] hmm dont no
x. [Were Sarcastic] phone

x. [Had A Nightmare] i duno my dreams
x. [Last Book You Read] dont read  

x. [Last Movie You Saw] meet the fockers  

x. [Last Thing You Had To Drink] water

x. [Last Thing You Had To Eat] brownie  

x. [Do You Look Like Any Celebrities] no 

x. [What Do You Like Most About Your Body]  that it has muscle lol, nothing..

x. [And Least?] fat

x. [How Many Fillings Do You Have] dunno too many...

x. [Do You Think You Are Good-Looking] not really...  

x. [ Fashion ] whatever  

x. [Do You Wear A Watch]  no  

x. [How Many Coats And Jackets Do You Own]  well ones that i wear to keep me warm.. 2 then jackets in gnerl not counthing the 2... liek 7  

x. [Favorite Pants Color] uh jeans...  

x. [Most Expensive Item Of Clothing] im cheap... my snowboarding clothes...
x. [Describe Your Style In One Word] trendy ha ha dont no i like that word..

[ Your Friends ] i dont have friends taht want to do shit wtih me .. but lisa... kayla... jackie.. lindsey..

x. [Do Your Friends Know You] i think so ..  

x. [Are There Traits In You That Are Universally Liked?] personality...
x. [How Many People Do You Tell Everything To] depends...
x. [ Music/Television/Books ] ska. punk. emo. rock. scremo i like all shit liek taht... /dont really watch tv if i do its like some shit on MTV or Mad Tv/dont read.
x. [Favourite Band Ever] Glassjaw. saves the day. starting line.... Difftly GJ is number 1  

x. [Type of Music Most Listened To] ska. punk. emo. rock. scremo i like all shit liek taht...  i like a good raop song every once and a while like.. snopp . drop its like tis hot!

x. [Type Never Listened To] country

x. [Favourite Book?] hmm duno  

[ General Questions ]

x. [Sunny or Rainy Day] sunny feels better  

x. [Do You Consider Yourself Lucky] nah  

x. [Do You Feel Pity For People Who Commit Suicide] yah
x. [Choose One Word To Describe How You Most Often Feel] laltly a lone
x. [Do You Own Plaid Clothing] ha ha no  

x. [Is There More Than One Zipper On Your Pants] no
x. [Do You Own Braces] no  

x. [Would You Classify Your Hair As A Deadly Weapon] no

x. [Do You Have A Favorite Brand Of Hair Dye] no but i do liek using the "red" color  

x. [Do You Own A Bandana]  yah  *thuggin*

x. [Are You Amused By Safety Pins] used to be  

x. [Have You Ever Used Duct Tape As A Sewing Substitute] lol nah
x. [Do You Like Candles] ye

x. [Do You Believe In Love] yes

x. [Do You Believe In Soul Mates] yup

x. [Do You Believe In Love At First Sight]  uhh... sorta  

x. [What Do You Want Done With Your Body When You Die] wahtever they want todo with it

x. [What Are You Gonna Do When You Get Older] uhh i dont no

x. [Look Out Your Window... Tell Me What You See] bare trees

x. [If You Could Have Any Animal For A Pet] zebra  

x. [What Is The Longest You Ever Stayed Up] dude relay for life.. all night but i stayed up til like 6 last nigh on the phone

[ Habits/Beliefs ] fate.

x. [Are You Disgruntled] dunno  

x. [Are You An Anarchist?] nah

x. [Do You Smoke Cigarettes?] no

x. [Are You A Vegetarian?] no
x. [Do You Think Meat Is Murder] no

x. [Have You Ever Slept In An Alley Or Park] baseball dug out.. drunk no where to go  

x. [Do You Wash Your Hair Less Than Once A Week] no *twice a day tomtimes)  

x. [Have You Ever Gone A Week Without A Shower?] ew NO!

x. [Age] 16

x. [Birthday] March 10,88
x. [Sign] picese  

x. [Location] new brunzwick nj  

x. [Status] uhhhh  

x. [Crush] hehe....

x. [Natural Hair Colour] brown  

x. [Current Hair Colour] red ish brown  

[ Favourites ]

x. [Eye Colour] blue   

x. [Word] word  

x. [Animal] dont no 

x. [Flower] white rose  

x. [Number] 17

x. [Color] red/black  

x. [Day] duno

x. [Month] uh october.   

x. [Song] uh.. a warm winter by the autumn overcast *check them out http://www.purevolume.com/theautumnovercast *  

x. [Movie] dun o

x. [Food] uh duno  

x. [Season] i liek them all for different reasons  

x. [Class] sports med  

x. [Teacher] ms martin  

x. [Drink]  dun o

x. [Veggie] duno  

x. [Television Show] duno  

x. [Radio] 106.3 if it came in better
x. [Store] uh ... brave new world
[ This/That ]

x. [Me/You] you

x. [Coke/Pepsi] coke

x. [Day/Night] night

x. [CD/Cassette] cd

x. [DVD/VHS] dvd

x. [Jeans/Khakis] jeans

x. [Car/Truck] car

x. [Tall/Short] Tall

x. [’NSync/BSB] my mom    

About Me [ Describe Your ]

x. [Wallet] green

x.[Hairbrush] purple  

x. [Toothbrush] its electic  

x. [Jewelry Worn Daily] class ring. earings

x. [Blanket] i have a few... it gets cold
x. [Facewash] apricot scrub

x. [Coffee Cup] wawa

x. [Sunglasses] not really  

x. [Underwear] thong thong thong

x. [Shoes] vans or those boot things *SO WARM*  

x. [Favorite Shirt] hmmmm .... i dont like shits i like the xip up jackets

x. [Favorite Pants] these pants i got from old navy that look like dickies  

x. [CD In Stereo Right Now] Postal Service, Senses Fail, and NYC underground dance part 5 disk 2

x. [Tattoos] none  

x. [Piercings] 9 ears, 1 belly

x. [What You Are Wearing Now] hmm its only 4 soo sweat pants and tank top  

x. [Hair] long..im gonna strighten it...  

x. [Height] 5'6"

x. [Shoe size] 10

x. [Parents] mommy and daddy

x. [Siblings] onlny child

x. [Live With] mom and dad

x. [When was the last time you...]  ??? if its waht i think it is.. last night or at like 530 while taking to mark lol *7 hours!*

x. [Smiled] ha ha now cuz marks singing :diong diong diong: 

x. [Laughed] now
x. [Cried] last night

x. [Bought] ticket to see meet the fockers but if like object i dont no i stole earings from clairs...

 x.[Danced] hmm dont no
x. [Were Sarcastic] phone

x. [Had A Nightmare] i duno my dreams
x. [Last Book You Read] dont read  

x. [Last Movie You Saw] meet the fockers  

x. [Last Thing You Had To Drink] water

x. [Last Thing You Had To Eat] brownie  

x. [Do You Look Like Any Celebrities] no 

x. [What Do You Like Most About Your Body]  that it has muscle lol, nothing..

x. [And Least?] fat

x. [How Many Fillings Do You Have] dunno too many...

x. [Do You Think You Are Good-Looking] not really...  

x. [ Fashion ] whatever  

x. [Do You Wear A Watch]  no  

x. [How Many Coats And Jackets Do You Own]  well ones that i wear to keep me warm.. 2 then jackets in gnerl not counthing the 2... liek 7  

x. [Favorite Pants Color] uh jeans...  

x. [Most Expensive Item Of Clothing] im cheap... my snowboarding clothes...
x. [Describe Your Style In One Word] trendy ha ha dont no i like that word..

[ Your Friends ] i dont have friends taht want to do shit wtih me .. but lisa... kayla... jackie.. lindsey..

x. [Do Your Friends Know You] i think so ..  

x. [Are There Traits In You That Are Universally Liked?] personality...
x. [How Many People Do You Tell Everything To] depends...
x. [ Music/Television/Books ] ska. punk. emo. rock. scremo i like all shit liek taht... /dont really watch tv if i do its like some shit on MTV or Mad Tv/dont read.
x. [Favourite Band Ever] Glassjaw. saves the day. starting line.... Difftly GJ is number 1  

x. [Type of Music Most Listened To] ska. punk. emo. rock. scremo i like all shit liek taht...  i like a good raop song every once and a while like.. snopp . drop its like tis hot!

x. [Type Never Listened To] country

x. [Favourite Book?] hmm duno  

[ General Questions ]

x. [Sunny or Rainy Day] sunny feels better  

x. [Do You Consider Yourself Lucky] nah  

x. [Do You Feel Pity For People Who Commit Suicide] yah
x. [Choose One Word To Describe How You Most Often Feel] laltly a lone
x. [Do You Own Plaid Clothing] ha ha no  

x. [Is There More Than One Zipper On Your Pants] no
x. [Do You Own Braces] no  

x. [Would You Classify Your Hair As A Deadly Weapon] no

x. [Do You Have A Favorite Brand Of Hair Dye] no but i do liek using the "red" color  

x. [Do You Own A Bandana]  yah  *thuggin*

x. [Are You Amused By Safety Pins] used to be  

x. [Have You Ever Used Duct Tape As A Sewing Substitute] lol nah
x. [Do You Like Candles] ye

x. [Do You Believe In Love] yes

x. [Do You Believe In Soul Mates] yup

x. [Do You Believe In Love At First Sight]  uhh... sorta  

x. [What Do You Want Done With Your Body When You Die] wahtever they want todo with it

x. [What Are You Gonna Do When You Get Older] uhh i dont no

x. [Look Out Your Window... Tell Me What You See] bare trees

x. [If You Could Have Any Animal For A Pet] zebra  

x. [What Is The Longest You Ever Stayed Up] dude relay for life.. all night but i stayed up til like 6 last nigh on the phone

[ Habits/Beliefs ] fate.

x. [Are You Disgruntled] dunno  

x. [Are You An Anarchist?] nah

x. [Do You Smoke Cigarettes?] no

x. [Are You A Vegetarian?] no
x. [Do You Think Meat Is Murder] no

x. [Have You Ever Slept In An Alley Or Park] baseball dug out.. drunk no where to go  

x. [Do You Wash Your Hair Less Than Once A Week] no *twice a day tomtimes)  

x. [Have You Ever Gone A Week Without A Shower?] ew NO!

x. [Age] 16

x. [Birthday] March 10,88
x. [Sign] picese  

x. [Location] new brunzwick nj  

x. [Status] uhhhh  

x. [Crush] hehe....

x. [Natural Hair Colour] brown  

x. [Current Hair Colour] red ish brown  

[ Favourites ]

x. [Eye Colour] blue   

x. [Word] word  

x. [Animal] dont no 

x. [Flower] white rose  

x. [Number] 17

x. [Color] red/black  

x. [Day] duno

x. [Month] uh october.   

x. [Song] uh.. a warm winter by the autumn overcast *check them out http://www.purevolume.com/theautumnovercast *  

x. [Movie] dun o

x. [Food] uh duno  

x. [Season] i liek them all for different reasons  

x. [Class] sports med  

x. [Teacher] ms martin  

x. [Drink]  dun o

x. [Veggie] duno  

x. [Television Show] duno  

x. [Radio] 106.3 if it came in better
x. [Store] uh ... brave new world
[ This/That ]

x. [Me/You] you

x. [Coke/Pepsi] coke

x. [Day/Night] night

x. [CD/Cassette] cd

x. [DVD/VHS] dvd

x. [Jeans/Khakis] jeans

x. [Car/Truck] car

x. [Tall/Short] Tall

x. [’NSync/BSB] my mom    

Lasts vs Firsts.

  Me and Marks first real Kiss.

  Me and Lindseys last time prolly being friends.

  First time in Voorhees NJ.

Last night was a... good night i was actully happy today and thinking about it felt good....

 Well i cant say all about last night because its 2005... dont want to think about the bad gotta think positive.... soo heres the good > Last night  i went to marks house we kissed. hugged. held hands. cuddled. made out... it was great his family was sweet speically his step mom shes funny.. very russian it was cute a little scary when they started talking russian and i was like there lol but she showed me pictures of him around the house! and  his sister like took a pic of us that was cute too i cant want till he sends it to me :) yeah after i got home we talked for like uh.. 2 hours close to 3..  OH! today i took a big step i told my mom about him.. i told what i really did last night i told her about shit with my friends it felt soo good to like... let it out... and when mark gets his license and comes down here hes allowd my moms chill with it.. that felt good too i just hope me and mark are chill :)

[He was My last kiss of 04 and My first of 05]

This sucks im back in school doesnt even seem like i had a break! sucks!

This is all i did:

Monday: meet the fockers. talk on the phone

Tuesday: lunch with parents. CATCH22 concert. talk on the phone

Wednesday: cry. talk on the phone

Thursday: same as wednesday

Friday: Marks :). talk on the phone

Saturday: work. talk on the phone

Sunday: sports athority. dinner. talk on the phone

oh that was my exciting week the best had to be friday night tho:) 

last night i didnt sleep, why? i think because i went to bed no earlyier then 4 am.. and no later then 6:30 am ( the time i wake up for school ) and last night i didnt talk on the phone for like hour it was just like 1 last night ...  but thats ok we talked on line and shit.  but i cant wait until he gets his license and shit. i hope things work out... everything seems ok when i talk to him.. and kissing him was soo much fun. we justlike giggled and omg Tara stop thinking about how great it was!

dude i think im sick. i thought i was gonna i die on the phone last night! dude he blazed salvia on the phone it was soo funny! then hes like oh yeah hold on and i heard him talking to him self it was funny. 6 days till he gets his license back! cant wait!

dude im such a slacker i didnt do any homework last night i did my whole paper for palumbos today adn the questions i forgot about those it would have sucked if i didnt get to finish but i did and i have time to write in here.. oh dude i have to delete all the music i DLed in school this sucks.. because i like the songs! oh well ill just redownload everytime i want ot listen to something..

hmm i hope theres kickboxing today even no i cant breath and my head and ears are killing me.. i think its lindseys fault that im sick.. cuz shes all pissed and thinks i used her to hook up with mark so shes prolly like OH! i hope u get sick from making out with him! its soo funnny he like hates he and talks shit about her everyday. 

Stupid thinks about America. 

1. why does it cost more money to call in state long distance then outta state?

stupid huh!

fuck i had a few other things last night.. oh no this is gonna both me i knew them like 2 mins ago .. well fuck it...

Dude yesterday i felt like SHIT but for some reason i did some kickboxing after school i actully felt good for a while... actully i didnt feel to bad that night either.. well Mark called me it was funny because he was hoping i would call him and i was hoping he would call me.. but im glad he made the move to call we watched this thing on hbo it was like autopsy shit.. i dont no .. it was weird im not really into that shit but ther was interesting stuff...

Dude weird dreams... i keep calling marks name out.. like.. i dont have any dreams i just think that im like still on the phone with him and that i feel asleep and im like mark!? like.. i keep calling his name in my sleep thats kinda weird..... hmmm he called me this morning i was so happy. he should really be sleeping but im glad he called plus i needed to wake up for school then so it was good too cuz i didnt want to wake up this morning if he didnt call i was totally staying home sick.. i think i still wanna go home sick tho.... everythings just like BLAH sick sucks... ha ha i think lindsey like cursed me to be sick because me and mark were making out... thats soo wrong...

Dude i totally have to do my website for this class but i dont want to!! its due friday and i only have the tricks page done.. i guess i should stop writing usless stuff and the word dude in front of everything...

1. Copy and post in your Diary.
2. BOLD anything that is true.

---I did this thing i cant spell to things i do sometimes....---
3. Leave plain anything that is not true.
4. Add something.

001. I miss somebody right now.
002. I watch more tv than I used to.
003. i love olives
004. I love sleeping.
005. I own a home.
006. I wear glasses or contact lenses.
007. I love to play video games.
008. I've done something illegal.

009. I've watched porn movies.
010. I have been in a threesome.
011. I have been the psycho-ex in a past relationship.
012. I like my handwriting.
013. I have acne free skin.
014. I like and respect Al Sharpton.
015. I curse frequently.
016. I have changed a lot mentally over the last year.
017. I have a hobby.
018. I've been to another country.
019. I carry my knife/razor everywhere with me.
020. I'm really, really smart.
021. I've never broken anyone else's bones.

022. I have a secret that I am ashamed to reveal.
023. I love rain.
024. I'm paranoid at times.
025. I would get plastic surgery if it were 100% safe, free of cost, and scar-free.
026. I need money right now.
027. I love sushi.
028. I talk really, really fast sometimes.
029. I have fresh breath in the morning.
030. I have long hair.
031. I have lost money in Las Vegas.
032. I have at least one brother and/or sister.
033. I was born in a country outside of the U.S.
034. I shave my legs.
035. I have a twin.
037. I couldn't survive without Caller I.D.
038. I like the way that I look.  
039. I have lied to a good friend in the past 6 months.
040. I know how to do cornrows.
041. I am usually pessimistic.
042. I have mood swings.
043. I think prostitution should be legalized.
044. I think Britney Spears is pretty.
045. I have cheated on someone.
046. I have a hidden talent.
047. I'm always hyper no matter how much sugar I have.
048. I've been sexually intimate with less than ten people.
049. I am currently single.
050. I have kissed someone of the same sex.
051. I enjoy talking on the phone.
052. I practically live in sweatpants or PJ pants.
053. I love to shop.
054. I would rather shop than eat.
055. I would classify myself as ghetto

056. I'm bourgeoisie and have worn a sweater tied around my shoulders.
057. I'm obsessed with my Diary!
058. I don't hate anyone.
059. I'm a pretty good dancer
060. I don't think Mike Tyson raped Desiree Washington.
061. I'm completely embarrassed to be seen with my mother.
062. I have a cell phone.
063. I watch MTV on a daily basis.
065. I have passed out drunk in the past 6 months.
067. I have never been in a real relationship before.
068. I've rejected someone before.
069. I currently have a crush on someone.
070. I have no idea what I want to do for the rest of my life.
071. I want to have children in the future.
072. I have changed a diaper before.
073. I've had the cops called on me before.
074. I bite my nails.
075. I am a member of the Tom Green fan club.
076. I'm not allergic to anything deadly.
077. I have a lot to learn. (Everybody should bold this…)
078. I have dated someone at least 10 years older or younger.
079. I plan on seeing Ice Cube's newest "Friday" movie.
080. I am very shy around the opposite sex. (depends on the person)
081. I'm online 24/7, even as an away message.
082. I have at least 5 away messages saved.
083. I have been rejected by someone.
084. I have made a move on a friend's significant other in the past.
085. I own the "SOUTHPARK" movie.
086. I have avoided work to play on Xanga.
087. When I was a kid I played "the birds and the bees" with a neighbor or chum.
088. I enjoy country music.

089. I love my best friend.
090. I think that Pizza Hut has the best pizza.

091. I occasonally watch soap operas.
092. I'm obsessive, anal retentive, and often a perfectionist.
093. I have used my sexuality to advance my career.
094. I love Michael Jackson, scandals and all.
095. I know all the words to Slick Rick's "Children's Story".
096. Halloween is awesome because you get free candy. *good time to smoke a bowl*
097. I watch Spongebob Squarepants and I like it. (used to..)
098. I have dated a close friend's ex.
099. I'm happy as of this moment.
100. I have gone scuba diving.
101. I've had a crush on somebody I have never met.
102. I've kissed someone I knew I shouldn't.
103. I played a musical instrument.
104. I strongly dislike math.
105. I'm procrastinating on something right now.
106. I own and use a library card.
107. I fall in "lust" more than in "love."
108. Cheese enchiladas rock my socks.
109. I think The Lord of the Rings is one of the greatest things ever.
110. I'm obsessed with the tv show "The O.C."
111. I am resentful that I have to grow up.
112. I am an entirely different person around different people.
113. I think the world would be a better place if people just smiled more often.
114. I think ramen is one of the best foods in the whole world.
115. I am suffering of a broken heart.
116. I am a nerd.
117. No matter where I am or who I'm with, I always seem to be lonely.
118. I am left handed and proud of it.
119. I TRY not to change who I am for someone.
120. My heart resides below my feet.
121. I have had sex with someone I was not in a relationship with.
122. I enjoy smoothies.
123. I have had major surgery.
124. I have adopted a pet.
125. I am listening to Radiohead right now.
126. Some people call me by a nickname.
127. I once stole a music stand.
128. I like pumpkin pie.
129. I love NASCAR!

130. I own a over 200 CDs.
131. I work 7 days a week.
132. I've had mono.
132. I don't have the ability to make decisions without changing my mind.
133. People tell me I have a horrible sense of humor.
134. I'm still in my PJs.
135. I'm looking for love in all the wrong places.
136. I have a tendency to fall for the wrong people, or have them fall for me, so I can't help but reciprocate.
137. I'll try anything three times. Almost anything.
138. Done drugs other than Alcohol or Cannabis.
139. I'm having trouble sleeping.
140. I am a cuddler.
141. I love John Waters films
142. I have made a pornographic videotape.
143. I'm a vegetarian

144. I am Pagan
145. I sing WAY more than I should.
146. I Really like the word : "Bazooka"
147. I Like Nuns
148. Been made fun of so much you want to shoot yourself.
149. I am obsessed with Wicked.  

150. I am in love with sigma phi epsilon brothers!
151. I like someone who I've known for a long time.
152. I think Sirius Black should be a real person.
153. I watch Boiling Points and laugh at the people.
154. Sometimes I'm too passive.
155. My room can't stay clean for longer than a day.
156. I still have a dial-up connection.
157. I hate leaving the house without a watch on.
158. I have a sick obsession with bean burritos.
159. I own bunny slippers.
160. Band isn't just something to fill the time.
161. I would pee my pants if I did not have Chapstick on me 24/7/365
162. I have my own car.
163. I love surprises.
164. I love one of my parents more than the other.
165. I over analyze everything.
166. I ate cheerios for breakfast.

167. I’m in love with somebody who doesn't want a serious relationship yet.

168. Garden State is my favorite movie....ever

169. I watch Fox News because I think it's funny.

170. I fall in love with people ive met on the internet.

stayed home sick yesterday... slept! yes! talked to Mark.... dude fuck the like.. police system.. they dont do many things right....

 for example there about to fuck this kids life up.. marks sopoused to get his license back monday January 10th after not haveing it for 60 days... so hes planning his life around getting his license back... hes getting a job. hes going back to college. hes gonna see me! great right!! but NO he gets a fucking letter in the mail yesterday just when like jan 10th is SOO close telling him he has to wait 60 more days and doesnt get his license back till March9th.. that means he cant get anywhere how the hell is he sopoused to be a Good kid or get money to pay for shit like fines if he cant get to the job he needs you no... thats bullshit....

ok moving on...

dreams are pretty weird.. what do they tell u ... is it want?... like.. i dont get it... i dont really no what my dreams are but latly.. like i call out someones name in the night.. is that fucked up.. like what does that mean?! like i wake up thinking were on the phone and i fell asleep on him and im just liek are u there? and i have a conversation with him too... its SOO weird......

<<HopiNg 4 a MirIcaL>>

 04<05

.:Saturday :. 

:SNOWBOARDING:

.woke up at 5:20am.

.wawa.

.bus.

.pit stop.

.itlian job.

.we're there!.

.snowboard.

.down.

.UP.

.ride.

.ride.

.ride.

.lunch.

.ride.

.terrian park.

.jump.

.jump.

.jump.

.rail.

.rail.

.rail.

.josh eats it.

.lindseys binding breaks.

.pit stop.

.ride.

.no feeling!.

.ride.

.ride.

.ride.

.home.

?hunter?

.drools.

.marky.

.home.

.din din.

.movie.

.marky.

.oh baby.

.oh baby.

.oh baby.

.night night.

saturday turned out to be a lot better then i planned!

.:Sunday:.

:ahhhhh:

.wake me up.

.breakfast.

.shower.

.notty.

.lacrosse..

.goal.

.win.

.home.

.wa.wa.

.home work....

.mark.

.homework.

.mark.

.homework.

.mark.

.din din.

.homework.

.mark.

.homework.

.mark.

.game time with mark.

.jackstrap and mark [squared].

.bed.

.no calls?.

.1 am.

.ring ring.

.wtf?.

.sleep...

.weird DREAMS!.

yeah sunday i had to like write a sentence outline for palumbo... yeh... i didnt do it.. but ALL sunday i took notes ... i dont even no what my topic is but im taking notes.... wtf.. this is the worst fucking research paper! i cant wait till this semester is over! omg its january 10th! marks sopoused to be getting his license fuck the law! well i hope when he trys to get it he gets it!

I HATE:

 research papers.

 writing outlines.

 you being soo far away

 that january 10th past and it was how it was sopoused to be

I HATE:

 research papers.

 writing outlines.

 you being soo far away

 that january 10th past and it was how it was sopoused to be